he loves me!

i know i tease alot about tom and his trips to walmart for gifts the night before a big holiday – or his lack of trips altogether….i may have even mentioned a couple of other little idiosynchrasies about his personality – not sure…..haha….but i gotta say – when it comes down to it…he loves me!  not long ago i did a post about megan and i going to sips and strokes and painting our dragonfly pictures….well…i had so much fun i asked tom to go.   the fact that he agreed is evidence that his love knows no bounds!   and agreed cheerfully!  and stayed cheerful as he sat on his stool in his little “one size doesn’t really fit all” apron looking around the room for any other male!  he was a wee bit apprehensive about his painting,….but look how cute!!!  i mean,…look how manly and butch that winged creature of the night is,,,,while i just painted a silly little owl.  haha

as i have spent the last couple of days feeling warm and fuzzy and loved….i thought of another time when tom totally gave up what he wanted to do for ME.   let me preface this little story with the following fact:  I HATE ROLLER COASTERS!!!  they are ridiculous rides of torture both physically and emotionally as you hang on for dear life, get jerked around at insane speeds, scream till your vocal chords are raw and see your life flash before your eyes before certain death occurs as one of the many scenarious you are envisioning happens….you fall out during an upside down turn….your car flies off the track….your heart stops beating due to stress and fear…or you plummet to your death as there’s no way the laws of gravity can be defied enough to pull you out of the killer descent you are in after that happy slow climb up the hill lulls you into a false sense of security.  roller coasters are stupid.  and i will take this feeling a step further and say that log flumes are dangerous, ferris wheels are WAY to high, those ships that swing back and forth were invented by Satan himself, any bungee type falling, jumping ride is so wrong i can’t even discuss it….and even merry go rounds can get out of control in the speed department if not watched carefully.  so knowing this about me…..i could say that my man was off his rocker to take me to an amusement park…..but since this post is about his undying love we won’t go there.  about the only thing redeeming about an amusement park is the cotton candy and funnel cakes – ha!

so about 25 years ago tom decides we should go to kings island in cincinati together….his first and only attempt to get me to go to one of those places.  i agree after a serious and binding pinky promise ceremony that i will not have to go on any life threatening rides.  (translation….my feet will never leave the ground)   we get there and he is lovely all day.  looks longingly at the life threatening rides, maybe lets out an inperceptible sigh of longing and keeps right on walking all day.  wins me more stuffed animals than will fit in the car on the way home (cause once you veto every ride in the park what’s left?  the “win-a-stuffed-animal” games!).  and then – late in the day….he sees it.  a ride he cannot walk by!  he points it out as it’s stopped and loading up for the next go-round.  well….he’s been amazing all day….and here’s what i see in my mind….

the planes are only 2 inches off the ground – how fast can they really go?  he deserves at least one ride and seems to have chosen something harmless.  so i agree.   now after climing in our plane…i notice that there wasn’t really any cute bumblebee face on our plane…or any of the others.  in fact, instead of charming butterfly type wings, our seem to be a bit….um…dare i say aerodynamic?  and tom seems way too excited about what i assumed was a little kiddie ride we had jumped in together.  well,, still expecting the best, i snuggle up next to my man and even casually drape my arm along the side of the “plane” preparing for our journey.  seems like a waste of time and money but i do don the seat belt provided.  then…off we go!  first couple of times around i am happy and life is good.  wind in my hair – birds eye view of nothing since birds never fly this low….i am a giver and it’s all working out.  then something goes terribly awry!  i look at the center contraption that our little bugs and bees are attached to and this humongous support brace shoots up into the air about 7,000 feet.  i feel my butterfly lifting up….and realize at this point that it’s much more like an actual plane than i had cared to admit.  in fact, the term fighter jet comes to mind.  tom gleefully grabs some “controls” that have appeared from nowhere and i feel MY control slipping away.  i watch in horror as the plane in front of us starts doing belly rolls and notice that we now HAVE an actual bird’s eye view as we seem to be ABOVE where even a bird feels safe.  i am imobilized by terror and cannot even speak.  needless to say my arm has been jerked inside the plane and i am as close to being curled up in the fetal position as one can get inside this little death trap!  i no longer see “bumble bees and butterflies” on this ride….i now see it for what it truly is….and here is what i am experiencing!!!  complete with absurd ascent and trailing smoke!!!

as i realize how very high and very fast we are “flying” i see tom start to push a button that says roll and know instinctively,  that in order to save my life,  i must take control of this situation NOW!  so i whisper “no tom – please don’t”.  not hearing me due to the evil cackle coming out of his own mouth….i try and speak up….”please sweetie, can we go back down?”  no response again… as the wind whipping around while we are flying at the speed of sound is kinda loud.  so i decide it’s now or never and somehow find a way to scream “GO LOWER AND SLOWER RIGHT THIS MINUTE OR THERE WILL NEVER AGAIN BE ANY INTIMACY IN YOUR LIFE – EVER!!!!”  he looks at me in shock and i say – “that’s right buddy – lower this plane and hand over those controls right this second or you will be one lonely sad little man for the rest of your life!”  looking defeated he hands me the controls and i uncurl enough to grab them.  then for the rest of the ride, as everyone else flies around at absurd altitudes and rolls and dives and all kinds of stupid stuff….i lower our plane back to the two inches off the ground position and we slowly putter around the center brace as anyone with any respect for the beauty of life would-  and should –  do. at this point other passengers in other planes are yelling to tom “dude – pull back on the handles!” and “man! push the RED button” thinking they are helping!  (tom has since pointed out that this ranks as one of his most embarrassing moments in life)  i am thinking if i just had a couple of rocks i’d knock those idiots in the head till they shut up!  (cause we all know how good my aim would be as i rode in terror on the ride-o-death)

as the ride comes to a close a couple of the operators come rushing over.  i am assuming to make sure i am okay!! to console me and apologize for my obvious trauma,  right?  no….they came running over to apologize to tom that his plan was broken!  “dude!  so sorry yours was broken~come over here to the front of the line and you can get on next in one that works!!”  i look at tom with the most ferocious look i can muster and he looks at the operator.  “um….ours wasn’t broken”.  awkward pause….  the operator looks at tom and then at me and then it dawns on him what must have happened and then – laughing so loud that’s all anyone at the park can hear – he walks off.  it took a couple of days for me to realize how much tom must love me to have handled that day in a way that totally revolved around my needs and wishes.  he’s a pretty incredible man….and i’m thrilled that he’s mine!

normal? probly not….

so let me preface this with the following disclaimers….

i have five children.  i love love love them….but somedays that seems like a lot   =D

they are five GOOD children.  i love love love them …..but somedays not so much – bah ha ha

well…this week is winter break for school.  so my five children are home all day.  all five.  all day.  home.  together.  all day.   =D   USUALLY this is fabulous.  time filled with chores being done spontaneously, hugs being passed out randomly, love being expressed at every turn, acts of service popping up faster than i can count them, basically heaven on earth over here.  that’s USUALLY….then there are those other little bitty moments.  moments when i look up and realize that the reason everything is running so smoothly is that the teenagers in the family are still in bed….at TWO P.M????   moments when i hear a blood curdling scream and run with the first aid kit to find out someone is upset that they can’t watch their choice of tv shows.   moments when i walk into the kitchen and do my own blood curdling scream as i initally assume a tornado has ripped thru the house and then realize my children have just fixed lunch and then walked away, leaving the debris strewn area for ME to clean up.   so yesterday….emma came into our bedroom and here is the conversation she had with her father….

dad?

yes emma?

i need some help on the computer!

whatcha need sweetie?

i need to go on stopbullying.com

excuse me?

yes dad!  stopbullying.com  they told us about it at school and i need to get on there.

why honey?

i need to report matthew and katie.  they have been bullying me and they must be reported.  bullying of any kind cannot be tolerated.  we learned that.

oh.  well.  do you think we could work it out another way?

um. no dad.  we can’t.  i have given them LOTS of chances.  it’s time to stop this bullying.  i am going to report them….and i am also going to read the section we learned about that helps us with “coping techniques”  (she actually said that!) so i can be in control of this situation.  so could you log me on before i get bullied again?

at this point i am envisioning my children being hauled off to “joovie”  =D  kicked out of the public schools and huge hospital bills for all of emma’s injuries….

tom, for once, was rather speechless.  he made up some excuse about being busy and luckily she forgot all about it. upon further investigation we discovered that the bullying consisted of matthew and katie not allowing her to play the xbox game she wanted to play…. but i was reminded for a brief moment that my kids are rotten?  no…i think they’re probly pretty amazing!!  (aren’t mom’s supposed to brag???)  and pretty normal the rest of the time!

would you rather?

my kids have a game they love that asks the question “would you rather?”….and then one of the cards gives you a couple choices to ask the other players….. examples?  would you rather run for five miles on two feet or hop for one mile using only one foot?    would you rather have three feet or three arms?  would you rather be bald or be super hairy?   so that’s the feel of the game…..  well emma was feeling a little bored today – and decided to come outside where tom and i were enjoying the fabulous weather and painting outside and announced that she was going to swing and talk to us….and next thing you know she has asked us to play her version of “would you rather?”  hind sight is 20/20 but we should have said no!  haha….   first question that totally cracked me up?  i asked her:  so em….would you rather have to lay in a bed of worms or a bed of roaches?  (now….yes…i realize that is a grotesque question to ask my 6 year old…and i have no clue what came over me….i think it was a combination of being uncomfortable with the questions she and her dad were trading where one choice was always death!  (would you rather eat a bug or DIE?…that kinda thing) and i kept thinking about that tv show where you had to do crazy/gross stuff to win a bunch of money)  anyhoo….i did indeed ask that ridiculous question.  her answer?  a fast and cheerful “worms mom!  totally the bed of worms!”  i swear it even sounded like there was a “duh!” tone to her voice!  so i asked how she knew that so quickly since they were both such nasty options.  her answer?  “well mom….i’m not scared of either of those things….so i’d have to go with which one was more COMFORTABLE…and since i like a soft bed – i’ll have to go with the squishy worms.  easy one!  now ask me a hard one mom!!!”   so…..swallowing my nausea….i ask what i think will be a very hard one.   and yes – in retrospect – someone probably SHOULD call social services on  me since this question is also not one i am proud of.  “ok em….you are at school during recess.  would you rather have your PANTS fall down….or your SHIRT fall off?”   i got her stumped, right????  uh…no.  she speedily and confidently answers “easy one mom….my shirt!  definately want the shirt falling off”   WHAT???  do i launch into my “modesty” lecture????  do i call the teacher and ask if she has been slipping her shirt off on a regular basis????  do i tell her she needs to at least CHARGE for this service???  being a model of restraint i calmly ask “um…emma….why your shirt?”   “well mom – boys take off their shirts all the time!  i saw three today just in our neighborhood!”  uh…yes emma – they do….but…well….er….boys don’t have boobs honey!   “MOM….i’m in FIRST GRADE….i dont EITHER!!!”   oh.  well.   i guess i see her point.  again…really just shouldn’t have asked that one!   last question…..would you rather stay at home your whole life or have to travel somewhere dangerous?   “mom – all your questions are so easy!  i would totally stay home!!!  like one place i could never ever go is south america…mom that is one dangerous place. we have been learning about these people in school and they built stuff with just their hands and some tiny little tools – no BIG tools that plug in…so now everything is all  in RUINS…and mom….there are some wicked wicked animals over there – there are crocodiles that bite you and poisonous frogs!!!  i could never go to south america.  so i’d totally just stay home.”    i am watching in amazement and wondering when my little emma is going to take a breath.  wicked animals?  she’s a hoot!   so here’s my question for you….would you rather walk across a pile of sharp tacks or read another one of these posts??  ha!  dont’ answer that!!!!

ouch!

this week something happened….and i have pulled a muscle (didn’t know you could pull something hidden so deep!!!)  OR more likely – based on my lack of muscle – i have pinched a nerve.  to be more exact…the sciatic nerve.  located….er…well…in my hiney.  based on the size of my hiney it must be a ginormous nerve.   which explains the horrific amount of discomfort.  i’m not joking about that part!  it REALLY REALLY hurts!!!  i am amazed – seriously amazed at the things i cannot do right now.   until this week the biggest “pain in my rear” had been tom – bah ha ha – but now….whoa!  this is awful!!!  getting into and out of bed would be a winner video on “americas funniest home video’s” for sure!!  it takes about 20 minutes and three to four really good screams.  walking up and down the stairs in our home is a true testament to how powerful the anchors must be holding that hand rail onto the wall!!!  if any of you have had this silly little thing happen to YOU….then you know that if you find JUST the exact right position, then you’re okay….vary from that particular stance for even a millimeter any direction and it feels like you’re being knifed!  and i find that pain shoots down my leg and my leg gets tingly and numb – yucky feeling!  sitting at the dinner table is tricky – probly the only plus in this whole experience!!!  =D    i have had a horrible time working.  if i bend over exactly right i’m okay…..so i have been painting by bending over a piece and walking around it thus looking like i am about 139 years old.  getting in and out of the shower is ridiculous (TMI, right?)  sadly – it seems impossible to cook, or clean, or do laundry….(half my day today was spent in mourning over that discovery)  hee hee  running a vacuum?  out of the question!  biggest issue???  alas….i fear this little injury could get in the way of my valentine’s day “festivities”…..ha!  no all night partying in this condition.  (when my children read this i feel quite certain they will be nauseated beyond help).  =D  guess i’ll have to stay in bed and recieve all the gifts of roses, chocolates, jewelry and spa gift certificates from the comfort of my boodwar!

he’s gone!?….

tom travels for work.  he is my best friend and so i don’t enjoy that!  it’s not the same without him here.  and the kids agree.  so….as we struggle to deal with life during the weeks that he is out of town, we have come up with a few…just a few mind you…things one might call advantages.

#1 – i find that for some reason the house stays a wee bit cleaner.  the kids have unanimously agreed that ALL the mess must come from dad!  (cause they would NEVER contribute to any disorder, right???)  i will say that my bedroom remains free of empty two liter soda bottles (which tom swears should have a handle since they are a single serving)…and his shoes and shirts stay in the closet where i put them vs. sneaking out and flinging themselves on the middle of the floor like they do when he is around.   and there are fewer blankets scattered thru the house since we sneak and turn on the heat.  ha!

#2 – kitchen stays a bit cleaner too since i have a tradition of taking the kids out to dinner once each time he’s gone.  this troubles my dear spouse since (and he’s RIGHT) there are more responsible things to do with our money.  but i tell myself that the memories we create at O Charleys or Ruby Tuesday’s – i mean mcdonalds or burger king!!! - far outweigh the tiny expense involved.  one of my children had the audacity (read stupidity) to tell tom that last time he travelled “mom took everyone out TWICE!”  well i jerked a knot in HIS tail!  ha!  (what a weird saying, huh?)  i did remind this child that we all know that dad is way cheap – i mean way wise – and that there are some things we totally lie about – i mean we just share when we need to.  no sense offering up information that will only cause sad feelings, right?

#3 – i have been known to occasionally allow my children what we call a mental health day from school.  tom is less fond of this practice than i am….but i have told my kids that as long as they have straight A’s and are caught up on all projects, if they need a day once every quarter i can deal with that.  take today for example.   matthew came in this morning and asked if he had to go to school.  are you feeling bad matt?  “uh….no….i’m just really stressed about my homework load.”  you are?  what’s up?  “well – i’m just really behind and it’s bogging me down”  (exact quote)  so i tell him he can stay home and catch up.  he worked hard and furiously.  came in and told me he was finally finished and totally caught up.  i looked at the clock and he HAD worked hard!!! for 32 minutes!  but we called it his mental health day – he’s doing great!

#4 – i can control the remote!  yee haw!  if i have to watch one more history channel show about the development of a new cave discovered when an extint insect was found chewing a leaf that had properties utilized when developing a thread-like substance that was found to be useful in finally resolving the matter of who shot president kennedy.  and he watches tv with the sound off and the words scrolling across the screen.  even if i’m not interested i feel COMPELLED to read it all!

so alas…..my man is gone for three days….and we are having a blast….i mean dressed in black and counting the seconds until his return!  hurry home tom!!!!!

be yourself!!

so i have a super wonderful friend who owns the Sips and Strokes in sandy springs.  she has graciously asked about 7,324 times if my daughters and i would like to come try it out.   well….we took her up on the invite this last weekend.  the only daughter brave enough to go out with her chubby aging mother was megan, so the two of us set out on our little “date night”.  i was quite apprehensive about the whole schmear since i cannot draw a stick figure…..much less paint a lovely painting.  megan was a little worried too which made me feel better.  so we get there and score some seats close to the front….and realize there are about 50 people there that night….one more thing to stress about?  nope!!  everyone is focusing on their own work of art and their own friends and their own “sipping”  – ha!  (apparently the “sips” part of sips and strokes helps one relax, unwind, and throw caution to the wind.  hee hee  i will admit to having a diet coke – fully loaded – to help my own nerves!)  and megan and i discovered way too late that it could also be called SNACKS and strokes…seems that other – more prepared patrons – marched in with mini buffets they set up for themselves and their friends.  i am holding sandra responsible for the lack of snacks on our table as she did not clue me in.  most likely because there is a limited amount of room on the table and she was worried that my snacking might overtake my stroking??  she could be right….i can see myself scarfing down loads of food and getting way behind on the pesky painting part.  ha!    so sandra is the instructor….and i was thrilled to find that her fun personality and super sense of humor totally were part of the class.  she cracked so many jokes during the intro part of the class that by the time we were finally instructed to pick up one of our brushes, i was much more relaxed.   our project that night was a painting of some abstract dragonflies.  here’s the kicker…..i was amazed at how these things turned out….not that mine is good – i’ll do the big reveal here in a sec….just that we all had the exact same instructions – which were very detailed – and they all turned out sooooooo very different.  megan and i were sitting right next to eachother….and heard the same instructions (“draw a curved line halfway down your canvas in yellow”    or  “make a medium sized circle to the right in blue”)  very basic instructions…. i find that i probably needed something stronger than a diet coke (which since i don’t drink would have to be a hunk of chocolate to help me finish on a sugar high) because these little instructions are stressing me and i’m hesitant and i can’t veer from her commands even a little bit.   no venturing out on my own.  no creative juices flowing.  just terror driven obedience!   then i look over at megan.  who i have not even been talking to as i have been concentrating on “making a small curved line in red” and gasp!  she is soooo getting kicked out!  she has actually decided that she wants her picture to match her bedroom….so as i am using red and yellow as instructed….she has been mixing a lovely green and a cheerful coral and has totally branched out on her own!  does her bravery know no bounds????  where does she get this defiant behavior????  MUST be her father!!!  we are instructed to outline the wings in black and megan says to me – “that’ll be a little harsh for the look i’m going for – i’m gonna skip that step.”   WHAT???  WHO does she think she is????  i am dutifully following sandra’s every command.  what kind of daughter have i raised???  will she spend her whole life pushing against authority????  should i seek professional help NOW? before things get worse????  oh where have i gone wrong?????   and then i take a moment and look at her painting.  and then i look back at mine.  and then i look at hers again.   she has created a beautiful happy masterpiece…..and i have created….an interpretation of the commands i followed.  megan has painted something that reflects her style and taste and personality.  i have created an interpretation of the commands i followed.  megan’s painting was held up for the whole class to see what a great job she did!  i was told “nice first effort laura”  =D    i left that night with several thoughts…..   #1 i am SOOOOOOOOO going back!!!  it was a BLAST!!!!  sandra – and the rest of the staff – did a wonderful job making it a super fun evening!!!     #2 i am soooooooooooooooo taking tom!!!  can’t wait to see what he comes up with!  #3  i’m going to try and relax and follow megan’s example of being herself.   that’s why all the paintings were different.  even when given the same specific instructions, a little bit of who you are ends up on the canvas.  i am excited and proud that megan had the courage to let a LOT a bit of who she is end up on the canvas.  what a wonderful evening!!!!  make sure you check out the website….  and get over there for a class – you’ll love it!!!      https://www.sipsnstrokes.com/home.aspx

MY dragonflies…..

MEGAN’S masterpiece!

i shouldn’t complain….

this year has been totally unseasonably warm!!  i have been so grateful!  but not everyone in my family agrees…..i swear i think i must be headed for that special “change” in life….i am rarely ever cold….i feel like some kind of canine as i roll down the window and hang my head outta the van to cool off since the family insists on having the van heated.  course tom is thrilled with this turn of events as he totally prefers the “bundle up till  you can’t move” option to “heating the house so we’re comfortable” option.  the heat hardly ever gets turned on over here.  on “chilly” days…tom builds a fire.   our “kindling” consists (i swear i am not making this up) of a plastic tub sitting on the hearth filled with cardboard items from our trash (envision captain crunch boxes, toilet paper rolls, and mac and cheese boxes)  that will help to light the “logs” which are pieces of wood and scraps from my shop.  i am fratically searching but have yet to see this tupperware-o-refuse on any HGTV show.  well….on the BEFORE part maybe but never as someone’s idea of classy decor!!!   it can get so bad that my kids seriously  walk around here in jackets and wrapped in blankets.  i wouldn’t have a huge issue with that except that since i have trouble OCASSIONALLY getting the kids to do their chores (that’s a whole nuther story!) i get a little irritated as they drag blankets thru the kitchen that never got swept, thus dragging debris to every other room in the house!  so in an attempt to cut down on the spreading of rubbish thru my home, i purchased – among other incredibly nice things – a Snuggie – for my daughter’s 18th birthday.  are those things dumb or what?  i had no clue!  i guess i never really watched any of the commercials on about them…..they really are just a backwards robe!  a hospital gown with long sleeves!  and based on the fact that they are masquerading as a blanket – they are long!  so – yep – you guessed it….refuse is still strewn from room to room as the Snuggie wearer parades around the house in it.  a blanket with sleeves.  (tom and i think it would be more aptly named a “bleeve”)  it’s one of those things that makes you think – daggum….if THEY can make a living selling THOSE….why aren’t I incredibly rich?????   so my advice is that you enjoy the unseasonably warm weather this week, refrain from purchasing a Snuggie, and bring the money that you would have spent on that over here and use it for some fabulous furniture!!!!

oh no!

okay…..so i have touched on this before….but i am getting seriously stressed about the fact that it SEEMS like my daughter isn’t going to drop the issue…and she SEEMS to actually expect that we will let her get her driver’s license!  really?   how does anyone ever ever put their baby behind the wheel of a vehicle and say to them….”see you later – you go out on the dangerous roads with your tiny amount of experience and your teenager brain and have a blast sweetie!”   i remember my first time driving off on my very own.  after promising my parents i would follow every traffic rule ever made plus the 17 they made up on their own….and swearing that i would stay at least 15 miles UNDER the posted speed limit…..i drove off….and as soon as i rounded the corner and was out of eyesight…..i floored that little mustang of mine, rolled down the window, stuck my head out and giggled like a 6 year old – till a bug flew in my mouth.   then i got a little more serious.  i truly think my parents prayed that bug into my mouth!!

the scary part is that no matter how careful she is….it’s the OTHER drivers out there that i have to worry about too!  driver’s like me.  heehee    one of my only two wrecks (not bad considering i am 21 and have been driving for 5 years now) ocurred in my own driveway.   it was NOT – of course – my fault…..but since tom parked his car behind mine, carefully manuevering it into my blind spot and then sneaking inside without telling me, i managed to back into one of our cars with our other car.  i had a wreck involving both of our own vehicles.  not one i am very proud of…..tom still brings that up occasionally.

the other scary part is that when you factor in family….and the skills (or lack of skills) she inherits from us (and when i say us i don’t mean ME)….it’s downright frightening.  common sense should be an integral part of the driving experience, am i right???  well tom’s mom had a little truck once….gas gauge broke….needle was stuck at half a tank.  she would fill it and it never moved….so she decided that it must be the Lord.  He must be filling her tank and it was a matter of faith…so she quit filling her tank….driving on faith.  now, i am a woman of faith myself….but i feel quite certain the Lord has other things to attend to and we are – naturally – required to fill our own tanks (that could be a very deep and philosophical topic there if you choose to discuss it in your homes!)   so she seriously drove around on faith and a prayer.   and got pretty good gas mileage for exactly how long it took her to use up the gas in the tank and RUN OUT.   that kind of common sense being passed on to my soon-to-be-driving daughter is just scary.

lastly….i am a bit stressed that my dad didn’t teach her to drive.  my dad has nerves of steel.  and nothing seems to scare him.  the fact that he still loves me after teaching me to drive a stick shift guarantees him a spot in heaven (next to my mother in law who will be driving around up there on fumes but with faith in her heart – ha!).  i remember crying and stressing while dad patiently and firmly insisted that i learn how to drive.  he took me to a hill in Lexington KY where i grew up that – no joke – was completely vertical and the plan was that when we got to the red light i would be tested on my shifting skills.  gotta ease up on the brake and shift into first without rolling into the innocent driver behind me.   well we get to the light and BAM- prayers ARE answered – it was green.   dad?  “go around the block honey – let’s try this again”   crud!   so i go around the block and BAM – Lord still loving me – it’s green!  ha!  dad”  “go around the block honey – let’s try this again”.   about the fourth trip around the block i am trying to decide how to explain to my father that he is actually going against the will of the Almighty here…when….dang it….the light turns red.  how dad could sit there so calmly while i planned my apology to the car behind us and wondered if all the insurance info was truly in the glove box is beyond me!   i should be HALF that controlled and loving!!!   he soooooooooo should have been involved in my daughter’s driving instruction!!!

but alas – it was me – wrecker-of-my-own-two-vehicles……descendant of “let-me-just-drive-with-faith-in-the-tank” …..and tom and i doing the teaching…..both of our vehicles almost have openings in the passenger side that lead to the street from where we have frantically braked FOR her.    all i can say is that i am TOTALLY praying for that bug in the mouth!!!!!!

i’m so excited and grateful!!!

so let me just say i am so excited and grateful for the opportunity i just had to work with Plaid Enterprises.  they are the cool company that makes mod podge and apple barrel paint and folk art paint.  everybody knows mod podge….great stuff…nuff said.  ha!  the paints are those little paints you can buy at craft stores or walmart in the little tubes…..and i had always associated those paints with mother’s day projects/elementary school/ and popscicle sticks.  ha!  well….because of an insanely wonderful customer, i had the opportunity to work with plaid and USING THEIR PRODUCTS i got to rethunk some furniture for a trade show they are doing.  i was thrilled with the opportunity (and just let me say everyone over there must have to have some kind of personality test before hiring….and i can’t image you’d get hired unless you were open, warm, fun, and happy!!) so anywho…..they asked about this furniture project and i thought…..sure…..uh….i’ll use your paint.  about 2,700 bottles of it should cover a dresser….but since you manufacture it, i’m sure you can get your hands on that much.    i was AMAZED!!!    here is a before and after of an armoire done for them.

BEFORE:   (yipes, right??)

it took less than three little bottles!!!!  i kid you not!!  three!!!!!  i sanded and used a primer and then WHOA!  the color choices are endless and so much fun!  and the paint is wonderful to work with.  the colors are vibrant and i chose a turquiose, a green to accent in inside of the piece and then used thier black to make a glaze that i applied after distressing the piece.  it was so affordable to work with.  i had been purchasing a quart of something when someone needed a special color…..now you just need to go choose a folk art color and bring it on!!!  gobs of choices and a way quality product.     and this next piece was also done with their products.

their sterling silver paint with their walnut glaze.  it’s opened a whole new world for me!!!  (can you tell i’m excited????)    so go pick a color – neutral, classic, trendy, vibrant, eye popping, soothing….they have it all….and bring it with your junk….and we’ll rethunk a little miracle for you!!!!    (also used their stencils on burlap to make some great pillows – they have gorgeous choices!)  if you’d like to read more about me….i mean them- bah ha ha….check out this link!

http://paintmeplaid.com/    or their facebook page

seriously…. check out their entire line of products – and think outside the box….Plaid can do SO MUCH MORE than my special mother’s day crafts!   =D

plan now!…..

so i’m doing this post mostly to give my dear romantically challenged sexpot a heads up that valentine’s day is fast approaching.  fast.  real fast.  and i thought i’d share some of my fond memories of valentine’s day.  the holiday of love and romance.   first is my memory of getting a heart shaped box of chocolates every year since i was a little girl from my dad.  it means the world to me.  in fact every year since i have left home he has mailed me a box of chocolates to wherever i have lived.  i have gotten boxes of chocolates from my first valentine in kentucky, arkansas, tennessee, and georgia.  few things have made me feel as loved.   then there’s our family tradition of having a “red dinner”.  everything we eat has to be red – and you have to come wearing red – and we set the table with red.  (we allow all shades of red – sometimes branching into pink)  =D  (i will say my kids have outlawed red chicken and dumplings  – said they looked like brains – yuck!  and when i tried to capture the feeling over st. patricks day they said the green dinner just looked gross)  here are some photos from last years red dinner….

(it was a close call here…..did i collect the bribes offered to NOT post the lips photo – thus becoming independently wealthy for life…..or just enjoy the immense feeling of satisfaction in knowing that i have put this particular photo on the world wide web….haha)

then there’s the  fond memories of all the jewels….and chocolates….and love notes i have recieved from my honey.  oh.   wait.   um….he DOES do the chocolates thing….but has discovered that they are on sale for FIFTY PERCENT OFF the day AFTER valentine’s day.   and why would someone who paints constantly need jewelry?  and it’s obvious that he loves me….why jot it down once a year?   well….he’s kinda right.  i don’t even need the chocolates!!!  i have a special friend who makes jewelry and i get my “fix” from her when i want to dress up  – and tom’s right – i don’t do that very often.  and lastly – when i think of all the time he spends fixing drawers, carrying furniture, working on our house, fixing the kids lunches and doing the car pool so i can sleep a little, doing the laundry and the ironing cause he wants to give me a break, bringing me a diet coke every time he walks thru door, running me bubble baths when he thinks i’m extra tired and sore….well….he’s right.  there really is no need for him to jot down his thoughts.  i feel very very lucky and very very loved!!!

 

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